What If

I'll lose the draw in a
what-if statement
(What if these thoughts are true?)
Then fight on, since
your quiet stare is
all we see of you

Two gloomy weeks broke
the light fixtures
(What if you saw their glow?)
I stop, then leave,
dismiss the pain
of trying hard to know

Just when, inexplicably,
footsteps cross
(What if you saw it, too?)
The faintest word
won't go unheard
by me, and much less you

I'll remember long,
long afterwards
(What if you don't forget?)
The strange half-second
dreamlike words
the stopwatch can't reset

So much the worse
So much the best
(What if you somehow know?)
Then stamp it in
your passport book
and I will not forgo

from writing on a
piece of quad paper
What if - what if - what if?
And softly set it
into code and
send it far adrift

MH // spring 2014